$50 a Day

Last week, on Wednesday afternoon at 2:3op.m. I pulled onto Aviation Drive of Dallas Love Field airport in Dallas, Texas. As I hauled roughly 100 pounds of luggage (on wheels for the most part) from Parking Garage B, Level 1, Row J, I questioned the trip I would embark on within the next few hours.

At 4:55p.m. Mountain Time, I would arrive in El Paso and be greeted by an employee of Buckner Children and Family Services, Colonias Program - Ricardo Brambila.

As I sat on the plane trying to drown out the old Ag across the aisle, boasting loudly about his amazing box at Aggie Stadium that he invites all of his customers to for home games, I tried to focus on what lay before me. I had signed up to go on a "Shoes for Orphan Souls" mission trip to El Paso and Juarez, Mexico with Buckner, several months prior.

What I knew when I signed up: That I was supposed to go. I felt in my heart I needed to go. I felt guilty at the thought of leaving my own children to go be with others, but I knew I needed to go. I assumed from the name of the trip that we would be giving shoes to orphans and that's about it. I knew I needed a passport. I knew I needed to be flexible. And that's about it. I knew nothing else.

In the week leading up to my departure, I was overcome with how little I knew. It wasn't the lack of knowledge about the itinerary or what I needed to pack, it was my lack of knowledge period. Was I supposed to know what to say to the children? Because I didn't. In fact, I envisioned myself becoming a basketcase and wanting to take them all home with me.

In the days leading up to my departure, I crash-coursed myself by reading statistics on the area, the culture, the poverty levels, and so on. I read and re-read our trip manual. Each item on the packing list had a check beside it (I would learn some of those items were recommendations). I had read what we were supposed to do each day, I read the verses the activities were based on, I read the Ladies Day flyer in Spanish and began to refresh my memory on my Spanish vocabulary. But still, for some strange reason, I felt like I had emailed my beloved teacher that I wanted to go on this trip, booked my flight, read the manual, packed my bags, and here I was on the plane. For no strange reason apparently, because thus was my reality.

In our packet we were mailed there was a devotional book to study prior to the trip, during the trip and after. In the last leg of my flight I decided to read another devo before I arrived. The words read, "Look into the mirror. Think about all of the things you like about yourself, dislikes, goals, flaws, dreams, expectations, accomplishments - now say goodbye." It said to say goodbye to yourself, because you wouldn't need any of those things. Thank goodness I thought. Because if it were me on my own I would truly screw this all up or accomplish nothing at all.

As I came down the escalator, I saw Ricardo there with a green Buckner shirt on, waiting for me. As we visited on the way to the hotel, and as I stared at a mountain range in Texas, we discussed the tragically high poverty rate in the border towns, and how most families who come here from Mexico make as little as $6,000 per year. I asked him, "Why do people continue to come here, to America, if these are the conditions they face?" His reply in additoin to the American Dream, "because where they came from it was worse; where they came from they were dying. Now they're surviving." Wow. A little difficult to wrap my mind around this right now.

We arrive at the hotel, I check in at the front desk, and go immediately to Room 119 - the supply room. Had the hotel not known who we were with and what we were doing, there's no doubt in my mind we would have been under survellience and drug task force swat team members would have busted into Room 119. We loaded big black rolling duffel bags each morning and reloaded them each night with 50-60 pounds of supplies (mani/pedi supplies, sidewalk chalk, coloring books, thousands of stickers, mirrors, bubbles, balls, school supplies, lotion, body spray - you know the good stuff). So, I walk in on the supply mafia finishing up some ladies goody bags and I'm briefed on our mission.

There would be 7 ladies from our church in Longview, all of whom I knew but was the youngest; 6 ladies from Peoria, Minnesota; 3 ladies from the Dallas area, 1 student from Arkansas and a mother and 14 year old son from Arkansas; a father and 3 of his 6 children from Phoenix. We would be ministering to women while hosting a Ladies Day type event, giving manicures and pedicures (out of most people's comfort zone), entertaining Spanish speaking toddlers, and doing crafts and activities with school aged children in the afternoons while their mothers received a new pair of shoes for each of them as well as a bag of school supplies for each.

Wednesday night, after everyone arrived, we met in Jane Ann's room for a meeting and some share time. Jorge Zapata, the Colonia Program Director for Buckner (our main guide for the trip) spoke and shared a little bit of his testimony.

Through thick Spanish accent, he told us not to become frustrated. "You may wonder at the end of the day how you could have made a difference in a child's life, or a woman's life, just in an hour. Just by giving them a hug. Just by helping them do an activity. But I was one of those children. My parents never told me they loved me. Their parents never told them. They didn't know any different. But I was visited by a mission group just like this one, and that affected me. They gave me hope, and that changed my life. I'm a pastor. My brothers and my sisters and our families, we kiss and we say we love each other. It changed my life. So don't think that you can't make a difference in just thirty minutes or an hour, and just by hugging and loving on the kids, because you can. You may never see the repercussions of your work here, but know that you are making a difference." Sigh. Jorge knew what he was doing. He was answering the question on each of our minds. It was comforting and reassuring.

Jorge, Ricardo, and Monie (Monica) all spoke about the conditions most of the people we would meet live in. No running water (for some), no electricity (for some), walking to get where they're going unless public transportation is available, eating the only two meals they get each day at school, sharing a bed if there is one, with one or two more children, sharing a house with two or more families, never owning a new pair of shoes, new pair of clothes, new anything.

Living on $50 a week, for a family of 7, made up of a single mother, 6 children, and the oldest daughter bearing an 8th member of the family. This family lives in a one room house that's smaller than most of our dens/living rooms and with two sets of bunk beds, and the mother leaves her 6 children at night by themselves to go bake bread for $50/week. These are families in the United States; in Texas, who are living like this.

Stats of Border towns
Ethnic Groups: Hispanic Americans, Anglos, Mexican Meztizos and Indigenous groups that have migrated to the border, Central American immigrants
Languages: Spanish, English, and “Spanglish”Religions: Roman Catholic, Protestant
Literacy: 58%
Unemployment rate: 32%
Population below poverty line: More than one third of families on the U.S. side of the border have incomes at or below the Federal poverty levels. Average household income for the 32 border county area varied from a low of $18,553 in Zavala County to a high of $41,283 in Sutton County.In 1999, about one in three border residents (29%) lived in poverty. During 2003, one in four border residents lived in poverty compared to 1 out of every 6 residents in the state. Thirty-two percent (32%) of Texas school children ages 5-17 lived in poverty in the 32 Texas border counties compared to 21% of school children in Texas for this same period.



We were in border towns, known locally as colonias, meaning poor neigborhoods. POOR. A colonia begins as nearly nothing. Homes are made out of wooden palettes and cardboard. Again, no exageration. The people construct their homes out of anything they can find and slowly build onto them. The two colonias we were in were much older and had been established for quite some time, so we saw more RVs with rooms built onto them, projecting out to the side. But the RVs looked as if they may fall apart at any moment. Many had old tires on the roof, which were full of water and attract mesquitos, but they are a neccessity to keep the roof from blowing off. Jorge said that people in the colonias would most likely never leave, but continue to build on to what they had. Hispanic people are very prideful, and they want to remain where they started, even if they begin to be more successful. Some will eventually build the wooden frame of a home around their RV, and keep building on that for years until they finally have an exterior complete. Then they will tear down the RV insdie and start on a new interior.

We drove around one of the colonias on Friday (Sparks). I took two or three pics but that was all I could stand. It felt a little sickening taking pictures of their poverty to show everyone back home. It was true. No electricity. No water for some. We saw several out houses on the properties. There is a recently passed law that mandates any person wanting electricity to acquire running water as well. That's good right? Yes, but that means purchasing a septic tank, which costs between $1100 - $3000. Most of these family make a minimum of $7,000 annually. So they go without either.


Some residents, like an elderly woman we were told about, work hard and save to pay off the owner of the land they live on, so they can finally call it their own. When she went to make her final payment and request the title to the land, she was informed that the land had already been sold to somone else before her. The land owners (duenos) will sell the land to two or three different people. The first buyer may not make the payments and then disappear, so he sells it again, etc.

You may say - they came to America, they can work. Yes, they can. But the border town areas have some of the lowest paying jobs and lowest wage rates in the U.S.

Without getting into all of the political issues and controversies that are tied to this area and what is going on there; before you may begin a list of "buts"; but they can work, they should abstain if their living in poverty, they should strive for a better life - think about it this way. Where they were living in Mexico was worse. The Mexican government for decades, has ingrained in its people to strive for a job to get by and nothing more. No aspirations of being something great, or better than their parents or grandparents. No education. Huge barrier - lack of education and people taking advantage of that. And, is this really our land? Are we not all God's children? Are we not all human beings? Would you rather live your life saying we shouldn't help someone because of any reason? Why not just help, serve, give? Enough.

I was very blessed to be able to go and feel very fortunate to have had the opportunity.

The first day we went to a colonia school - not really a fully functional school - more for mothers and young children - we conducted the Ladies Day in the morning and did shoes/school supplies/activities with the kids that afternoon. The majority of our group gave the mothers who came that morning manicures and pedicures, while they watched the Hope video (Esperanza). Most of the women said they had never had a pedicure or never had their feet rubbed. The group also made them a salvation necklace and told them about Jesus. While this was going on, I was part of a smaller group who had the mothers' preschool children. Also, keep in mind that English is the minority spoke language among this group. I was fortunate that a lot of my Spanish vocabulary came back to me which was a miracle in itself. We played games and entertained the little ones while their moms were pampered.

In the afternoon the older children would come with their families/mothers after school to pickup their shoes and school supplies that we had ready for them. We did crafts and played with the kids while the moms stood in line for shoes. We helped them make mirrors and told them how God had made each of them unique and that he made them for a purpose. You should have seen the look in their eyes when we would say this. It was a flash of hope. Something they don't hear too often.

It was incredible, the difference in these children from those who are born and raised here in the United States, or most of the U.S.
Even the older teenage boys were putting stickers on their mirror and didn't seem to think they were too cool to do the activity, as you would have assumed. The brothers and sisters were nearly inseperable. You could see the look of deep love and protection in their eyes for one another. I could see an older brother standing so close to his baby sister and I saw in his eyes a look of "I will take care of you, I will protect you, I will make sure you are okay."

Few things/people that stuck wit me:
Rene
We were in the final hour of our organized chaos on Thursday. I had just help to round up all of the kids from playing outside, because we had broken a window out playing ball. I knew that was going to happen. Ikept yelling "ventana" trying to warn about the windows but that didn't help obviously. So we herd them back inside and a group sits back down at our table and I'm the only adult there. The other group members had gone to help with shoes. And I think, okay this is my chance to actually talk to them and tell them what we're here to tell them. So here goes the conversation:
Note: school-aged children speak English for the most part
Ashley (AG): So...who knows how the earth was created?
Several hands shoot up and I here ooh, ooh, ooh. "God did," from several.
AG: Very good, that's right. And how many days did it take Him?
Kids: Uummm....a hundred?
AG: No! Not one hundred. It only took Him six days!
And then I begin to read, in a kid-friendly version, the six days of creation and what happened on each day.
AG: So, that's how everything was made in the beginning. God created everything - all of you, the trees, plants, animals, bugs, fish, the earth, water, all of it.
Rene (this is a young man between 8-10 years old. I had been with him earlier that morning. He came with his mom and baby sister b/c he was sick): Sooo...how did God make the earth? I mean there was nothing, right? So how did he make it?
AG: Oh dear (to self)
Little girl beside me: Um, because He's God and He has powers that we don't even know about!AG: Exactly right!
Rene: (He ponders that for a moment) Well, if God made everything and he is in control of everything.....then why does He let people die?
AG: (My heart just burst in my chest, my eyes are crying from the inside. I'm thinking, I am not equiped to answer this Lord. Please answer him for me. I can't.) Well, Rene. I don't know the answer to that. Sometimes bad things happen to us and to people that we love and we don't know why, and all we can do is pray and ask God to help us understand. And that helps make us feel better, because we can talk to Him about it.
Rene: Okay.
A few minutes later.
Rene: Well, do you believe in Santa Clause?
AG: Well, yeah!!!! Of course I do. Who doesn't believe in Santa Clause?

Don't Judge Me
On Friday in the afternoon (shoe and activity time), I saw a little girl come in with her mother, who I had played with that morning. Stephanie. She was probably two. So I went and got her while her mom went to get her shoes and supplies. Stephanie colored for a while and about fifteen minutes later I saw her mom come back into the room and sit over against the wall. No big deal. I figured she was waiting for Stephanie to finish her picture. Well, time passed, and kept passing. In fact, so much time, that I had covered little Stephanie in stickers. Her face, hands and shirt. And I was covered too. I was loving it, but it my judgemental self kept thinking, "I can't believe her mother is just sitting over there, when she's already go the shoes. She's kind of using us as a babysitter." Like it mattered!!!!!! Anyway, I kept thinking, I'm having fun with stickers, but I feel like I should be talking to the older kids who are at my table doing the mirrors. That's what I'm supposed to be doing right now. Telling them about creation and salvation and how they were made for a purpose. Well, Stephanie stayed the entire time. I did end up going and talking with some of the kids. As everyone was leaving Stephanie's mother walked straight up to me and hugged me so very hard and whispered thank you. Then she leaned down to her daughter and told her to kiss me and give me a hug. So I said my goodbyes to little stickered Stephanie. As they walked away, Jane Ann came over to help me clean up and she said, "There were these moms over there just sitting and sitting and they already had their shoes and I kept thinking, they can leave if they want to. I said, "Yeah...that happened here too." She said, "So, I was going to go tell them they didn't have to stay, that they could leave, and Jorge stopped me and said," "You don't know how far they have to walk to go home or what they're going home to. They probably want to stay here as long as possible." Stop judging Ashley!

The Little Things
There were several children who would not smile. It was hard for me to accept this. I would try everything under the sun, no inhibitions. I wanted them to smile. One little boy never did and really bothered me. My Gisele, who never broke a smile the entire morning. She wouldn't let me put her down but wouldn't smile, nor respond to me dancing, making faces, coloring, candy, balloons, Spanish Vegetales, sidewalk chalk, nothing. But that afternoon - bubbles and stickers. I busted out the bubbles, the $0.50 bottle of bubbles and some stickers and she began to smile and chase the bubbles and she wanted stickers all over her. Something that simple. Something that might have distracted her mind for a bit.

I was only there for the two days that we did this itinerary. On Saturday the group went into Mexico, city of Juarez, to an orphanage to distribute shoes and love on the kids. I have heard that this went really well also, but I was unable to attend. I came back to be in Candy and Matt's wedding, of which I was honored to do so.

The trip was wonderful. It wasn't long enough in some respects. It opened my eyes. It lit several fires. It showed me ugliness. I saw a beautiful culture and people who are so easy to fall in love with. I saw God working. I was challenged.

We all need to do something. We all need to go somewhere. There is work to be done. There are things to be given of ourselves. There are children to adopt.

Here are some comments and statistics from an email from the Buckner staff about our trip:

I forgot to mention that we were the very first group to go to Canutillo, which is where we went the first day.

Jane Ann wrote: This is the report sent to the corporate Buckner office about our trip. I thought you would all find it very interesting and encouraging that you were the team that was so important to our colonia ministry. I had told you that you were a "test" case but I'm not sure you realized how important and strategic you were to this ministry.
Thank you again for your obedience. Isn't God amazing?
jac

From: Dexton Shores
Subject: Final Report on SOS El Paso-Juarez Trip

Jorge sent a final report of the results of the SOS El Paso/Juarez Trip, and Wille Hernandez, our director at Buckner's Children's Home in Juarez, Nuevo Amanecer included something about the SOS trip in his weekly report. Following are both Buckner staff member's first-hand accounts:

Jorge said:
"We ministered to over 950 people in three locations: Canutillo, Sparks and Juarez. There were 63 professions of faith, 24 volunteers, 192 hours worked, with six Buckner staff and one spouse.

The Juarez trip was a blessing and turned out to be more of a trust and faith trip. Everyone was on the lookout as soon as we crossed, waiting for the police escort to arrive, but seemed to be relaxed from the tension and negative stories they had been exposed to.

There were about 250 at BAN ('Offering Aid to the Needy') that attended and we ministered to 100 children with crafts and Bible stories. Most of the families were from the church and a few from the community and the Buckner Children's Home in Juarez. Willie Hernandez (director of the children's home) and the children were very excited about receiving the shoes and the van donated by the Rio Grande Children's Home in Mission.
The national Hispanic TV Station "Univision" was there to cover the event and the story came out on the Sunday night news. They opened the story by saying: "Because of all the violence going on in Juarez, many religious groups have cancelled their trips, but Buckner International came anyway to make a difference in Juarez. We have positive news to report in Juarez and this religious group is why. Moni Skrzypinski was interviewed and explained our purpose and Miguelito from the Buckner Children's Home was also interviewed. They both did a great job!.
All the ladies that came, now have a new mentality about Juarez. All of them said they want to come back and said they believe the American News is exaggerating all the negative. Some called back home and told them 'You need to come and see for yourself'. Our last night together was a blessing and each participant shared how their lives had changed and how they were going back home to be a VOICE for Buckner. Three ladies told me that their relatives were very upset because they were coming to Juarez and they told them: 'I am going because God has put it on my heart to be a part of this trip and I must obey God'. Two ladies committed to designate an offering to the Buckner Orphanage in Juarez and BAN. They said they would also see if they could get their church involved.

All I can say it that the trip to Juarez turned out to be a blessing because everyone in the mission group was convicted to pray for the American Church living in fear and for Buckner staff that are out in the field trusting God for daily protection."

Willie said:
A big event for the children was the Buckner shoe drive at the church in Juarez and the fact that we were going to get a new van. Saturday, we got up early, got ready, had breakfast and we took the city bus to Juarez.( two hour drive). In Juarez, we took another two buses (30 minute drive) and finally got to the church. We arrived 5 minutes before the mission group did. The children really enjoyed the trip, the activities, the shoes and were very excited about driving back in a new van. It was a fun day.
Something to share... While at the shoe drive, Channel 26 of Univision arrived to interview and to report the event and Miguel was interviewed all of the children's it home got excited. It seems that Miguel is like a magnet when it comes to T.V. appearances. He has been on T.V. three times already, the first time was when the ambulance took him to the hospital and the reporters of Channel 44 were there and filmed the moments they were getting him out of the ambulance and reported about his accident. This happened two years ago. On his birth date last year, we took him to the movies, and at the mall where we were, they were filming a T.V. Show for children. The clown invited him to be part of the show, got him a cake and gave it to him in one of segments the show. So who knows?, Miguel might be the next T.V. evangelist!
Also at the shoe drive something very coincidental or a divine thing, but it happened. Our twins Abril and Abigail had received shoes that a friend of the ministry had sent them. Abril got some Dora the explorer shoes and Abigail got some different ones. At the shoe drive Abigail without her choosing them, was handed a pair of shoes identical to the ones Abril has, same color, same design, and so now they both have the same shoes like twins usually do. Two small incidents, but to them these incidents were a big deal.

I praise God for our Buckner staff and the way they allowed God to use them to bless the residents of El Paso and Juarez in spite of the challenges and risk. God is worthy to be praised!
Dexton
Dexton Shores Director, Ministry Development-Mexico & Border